"How To Talk To Your Boyfriend
To Cultivate Deep Level Emotional Attraction
That Lasts Forever!"
Have you ever said something to your boyfriend that instantly put a huge gap between the two of you?
And perhaps you realized it after you've said it...
And it was too late already because the effect of your words was disastrous.
And you wished you could take it back but you didn't know how to, and didn't know what to say and how to fix it, and how to communicate with your man in a way that would bring him close to you instead of pushing him away!
And you just know that the way you currently communicate with your man makes him pull away further and further and you don't know how to change it because you don't know how to communicate with him to deepen emotional intimacy, make him understand exactly the meaning of your message beyond the superficial words, and make him think of you as his forever woman, the woman who gets it.
Do you know that one of the most critical ingredients any man desires to have in a woman, and the thing that makes his woman special and irresistible to him in a way that no other woman can compare with is the woman's ability to 'get it', to touch his heart in a way no one else can?
The Way You Communicate With Your Man Will
Make Or Break Your Relationship!
Read the story below to understand how women ruin their chances for a good relationship with the man of their dreams and ask yourself whether you recognize this problem in YOUR relationship!
Amber and Bryan met a party. Bryan was every woman's dream – tall, dark and handsome. There was something about him that resembled Prince Charming every woman grows up dreaming about. Not only that, but he was extremely accomplished, a self-made millionaire, who yet remained humble, personable, charismatic and good-hearted. And the best of all, he was a high moral person, and loyal to a fault.
What else can a girl ask for?
Bryan was Amber's instant band-aid on a bleeding wound of loneliness. It's like she instantly filled the deep void in her heart. No wonder, she invested herself into him wholeheartedly.
Naturally wanting to spend as much time as possible with her newfound love, Amber inadvertently became deeply emotionally co-dependent on Bryan.
Here is how she tells her story:
When they met he seemed instantly enamored by her. After their first date he asked to become exclusive. They became intimate on their third date, and ever since they got involved into a whirlwind relationship that took them on the highs and lows of a typical infatuation – withdrawal cycle.
The problems crept up unexpectedly. See, Amber was very domestic, and at the age of thirty three was very ready to settle down and have her first child. Naturally, she began doing things like a good domestic woman should, such as buying household items for his house and decorating. She ever re-painted his living room to make it the color she wanted.
Bryan was receptive to it at first. But after a while he became more protective of his space. It felt as if she was taking over his life. On the other hand, Amber always had his best interest in mind. She was trying to make the place cozier for them.
Ahhhh.... The key word – THEM
See, in Bryan's opinion, yes, they were girlfriend and boyfriend.... but not husband and wife....
And that was when he felt that she started putting premature demands on him.... like wanting to know where was at every given point in time... Getting upset when he went out alone or with friends and didn't invite her to come along...
And the reason he didn't invite her was that he had started to get annoyed or irritated with her...
One time when they went shopping for Christmas and she picked a dress he ended up buying for her.... and then he said something as they were driving back to his house that made her upset.... and she got so upset out of control that she told him she didn't want the dress....
Oh no! When a man gives you something, you appreciate it..... it's bad manners to not appreciate his effort, his gift....
And as a woman I can understand that the problem was that she didn't really want the dress...... well, not that she didn't like it.... after all, it was Amber who picked up.... but he just didn't see the big picture!
She wanted more of a commitment from him.... she became unappreciative of the things that he gave her thinking that was what she wanted.... because deep down she just wanted to see a higher level of commitment..... and not the things he bought for her..... not the luxury vacations he took her on.....
What he didn't realize was that the more she got attached, the more she just couldn't see that he was getting as invested as she was... and that created discrepancies in the way each of them felt in a relationship... and a distance...
And every time he did something for her, she got more and more hurt.... But she didn't know how to communicate with him about it... she became withdrawn, refused to talk to him, left him and did not call him or respond to his calls for days... but she still loved him, so after days and weeks of no contact she went back.... finally hoping that he would somehow pick up on the unspoken signals.... and give her what she wanted.... but he didn't!
Have you ever been in a relationship where no matter what you do or say, it starts to feel that you are constantly in pain?
And you know, a relationship is supposed to make you feel happy.... but all you feel is this constant nagging pain...
That's how she felt too...
One time after a separation she went over to his house to find that he had bought a new bed.... it was a queen size.....
When she saw it, she immediately became defensive....
What she thought was that he DIDN'T SEE HER in his future! Or else, he would have bought a king size bed.... see, it wasn't about the bed... it was that she started reading into things.... but instead of communicating it to him she just bottled up her feelings and they came out in a very ugly form...... and were intense..... it's as if you shake a bottle of sparkling cider and open up the bottle... all those feelings bottled up until there was no more room to squeeze them in and when they came out, it was an explosion.....
Do you ever find yourself not knowing what to say and how to communicate with your man to make him adopt your thinking and give you what you want?
A lot of women who experience this problem are not able to sustain and develop a good relationship, and instead end up in a break up and heartbroken!
There was another break up that followed shortly.....
They got back together again.... and this time he wanted to surprise her with a home cooked dinner.....
Preparing for their quiet evening at home, Bryan went and bought firewood for the fireplace, new table cloth and a new dinnerware set.....
He spent hours preparing the meal, he cooked steak to perfection just the way she liked it... he chilled a bottle of expensive Champaign, bought a bouquet of roses, her favorite.... made a cake and whipped the frosting....
Amber showed up to another one of her disappointments. She didn't see the effort Bryan had put into getting everything ready for her... what she saw was that, knowing perfectly how much she loved being domestic, getting household items and kitchenware for his place.... he didn't invite her to his shopping endeavors and instead he went on his own...
'It's just a set of plates', he said to me a lot later in a discussion....
'So', I said, 'to her it meant that you didn't see her in the future... it was a sign... it was an indication of how you felt about her and how much into the future you saw her.... You know, it doesn't matter how good of a steak you cook when you send your girlfriend a subtle signal just how much she means to you....'
See, the problem was that Amber didn't know how to communicate her feelings to Brian in a way he understood....
If only had she known how to convey what was in her heart.... they would have been on the same page... because Brian did, in fact consider Amber as a future long term partner... perhaps a wife... but their consistently poor communication patterns had put a gap so huge that they ended up breaking up....
See, it's just that men and women communicate differently...
Have you ever felt that you said something to your boyfriend and that was taken completely differently and not the way it was intended?
Sometimes it seems like the whole nature of relationships is designed to encourage you to say the wrong things over and over again.
And it's NOT YOUR FAULT!
It's just that if you try to avoid being defensive, then he says you’re being too aggressive. If you try not to say anything much at all then he accuses you of passive-aggressive behavior.
Ever wonder about that?
So, how do we talk to men? And what do men want us to say, and what not to say?
Not surprisingly, most relationships fall apart not because there is someone else he's falling for, and not because there is something drastic such as infidelity, betrayal, or something just as terrible.
Nor do we break up with our partners because of a single argument or a disagreement.
Disagreements are healthy because no two people are alike. Learning how to solve disagreements without hurting each other, without emotional withdrawing or backstabbing passive-aggressive behavior is the real art of maintaining a healthy relationship that grows to become a life-long partnership.
If only men came with instructions, like a cookbook, with easy to follow recipes laid out that just take a gentle bit of tweaking to create something great.
Nothing can live up to those dreams but.....
I get asked this over and over, what exactly do I say to my boyfriend when he says this and that, or when he does so and so?
So, how do you know how to communicate with your man so that he understands and feels exactly the way you feel?
- How do you deal with conflict and maintain confidence and composure while doing it?
- How do you keep a high level of respect with your man and not be a push over, while being kind and gentle at the same time.... and yet stand your ground?
It's true that men don't come with an instructional manual like an HDTV or an iPod, and a learning process doesn't happen overnight, and sometimes it takes years and breaking a few bones, BUT ….. If you have read any of my relationship books, you know that they empower women to become the kind of irresistible, mysterious and alluring woman every man desires, regardless of their looks, their job, their money, or anything else besides knowing how to touch your man's heart in a way that no other woman can or ever will.
What if I gave you specific examples on what to say when your man says something hurtful, and how to say it so that he understands you, accepts you, agrees with you, and gives you respect?
The level of respect he is giving you will instantly boost through the roof if you say certain things I will show you.....
You know that for a woman LOVE is probably the most important thing in a relationship.... but for a MAN it is RESPECT that's the most important.... and without respect there is not love for a man!
When you spend some time memorizing the secret communication techniques that I am going to teach you, you will be able to bring your man closer to you every time you utilize these secret communication tactics in your relationship, respond better during a disagreement, and keep your man from storming off in disgust and eventually getting tired with you and leaving you!
You will also learn:
How to flirt with any man, whether you are single looking to meet the right man, or want to keep the mystery and the spark alive in your relationship...
Knowing how to utilize secret communication techniques in your relationship will boost your confidence! It will teach you how to communicate with your man in a way that will show him that you are gentle yet assertive, and transform you into a magically irresistible woman with pride and composure... The kind of woman that men deeply value!
How will this change your life?
I will tell you specific examples and phrases designed to deepen your relationship so that you can say positive things your man will appreciate. They will bring you closer. He will be proud of you, and proud to be with you.
He will be so proud of you, he will want to introduce you to his friends, family, and the deepest darkest, most intimate secrets of his life!
You will never be scorned, pushed away or walked over....
You will be the woman with pride... and you will stand your ground, and yet, you will be the strong, but soft and feminine woman!
The combination of qualities that every man desires in his ideal woman!
- Money issues are some of the biggest contributors into relationship failure – find out how to discuss money matters before they become a problem
- Learn Neuro-linguistic Hypnotic Communication Secrets! Mesmerize and hypnotize him with only your words!
- Learn how to express love in a way that will draw him closer to you every time!
These communication techniques will make him literally ADDICTED TO YOU!
When you use these communication secrets, he literally won't be able to get enough of you!
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If you don't have the kind of love and deep emotional intimacy with your man as you would like to have...
If he doesn't see you as the ONE and ONLY for him...
Ask yourself, perhaps you are not communicating with him in a way that triggers his 'hot psychological buttons' that make a man's heart melt and give the world to you!
With this guide you will learn how to melt his heart by expressing love and touching his heart with love in a way that will make him realize the kind of close emotional bond that only you and no other woman has ever and will ever have with him!
P. S. Remember, if you don't know what it is that's currently rotting your relationship from the inside, get this valuable information now before it's too late!
P. S. S. If you think that you need to improve your relationship; if you think that you need to learn how to communicate with any man the right way; if you want to learn how to flirt with men and attract any man, this information is for you! Invest in your future Now! Never have another argument!
Elaine M.D, a Dating and Relationship Coach and Author